Sunday, 9 March 2008

Need to find someone new to like...any suggestions?

The show must have (just as I suspected) been SO painful for everyone in the audience, because the stage is so MAHOOSIVE, you couldn't hear any of the chorus all.

And the younger people put barely ANY effort into it whatsoever.
I was bloody sweating after my solo 'Somebody to love'...which went better than expected.

Also, everyone of my friends who said they would come came...but what's more is that everyone who said they probably wouldn't come came too...apart from Kaz (who said he would come when we were together)...but tbh, he probably wouldn't have been that supportive at the end anyway, and he's not obliged to support me why would he have come?...shut up. About half of the left side of the audience was taken up with people from my school!! Of course they didn't JUST come to see me, 'cause another one of my friends. Shar, was in it too she was SO good, we had this scene with her..(you know the last scene that I told you about?...the one I was crapping myself about?) and she filled in lines for another girl who was hopeless in that particular scene...well tbh we were all pretty hopeless compared to the rest of the show.

At the end of the show they were all screaming my name and some of them threw flowers at me...good thing too, if they'd thrown tomatoes I would have just picked one up and eaten it. oh well.

I went to a restaurant afterwards..and after that to a friend's house with quite a few other people. Everyone was telling me how 'amazing' i made me feel so buzzy. Some of them said I 'glued the show together'. HAHA two of my friends were actually crying at the end...I asked them how bad I was and they were like I'M SO PROUD OF YOU.

I want to do the show again, NOW.

But today.

I want a boyfriend already, i need one...otherwise I'll get depressed, why can't you just walk up to a random hot guy and said 'Hello, would you like to be my boyfriend?'???? It's just not done, but why? I just miss having someone to go to who I can be open and affectionate to...and they can be back...Kaz wasn't very affectionate....okay shut up now.

Also, the cosmic horn is getting worse...couldn't I at least have the general horn? would be easier. I need to like someone, it makes life so much more interesting, I still like Kaz, but I'm definitely not gonna try anything, or get back together...well I might try the whole friends with benefits thing...but I doubt it will work, it would basically be the same as what it was like actually going out with him, he'll act like we're not together at school...then when we're both 'horny' it will be as if we are going out...but less.
I kind of feel like once his mother got back from India he like didn't want/need me anymore, and that was one of the reasons it all went downhill (including my extreme tendencies to moan to excess). I mean, if this was the case I think it would be quite sweet that he wanted some sort of woman in his life, to kind of look after him. But why did I have to make it me?!

I just sort of wish I hadn't got emotionally involved with him, I don't think we made a good couple, we're so different, and everyone was telling me that all along, they were all saying that they didn't think he treated me very well, and I should have listened. But oh well, I didn't.

Ugh, I really don't know how to get my point across to you few readers!

He is really nice inside, like REALLY nice,as in, helps his elderly neighbor bring her shopping into her house. And that cannot be good for his "image"
He just has a quite tough outer shell, but once you break through it he's such a lovable person.
I want to be friends with him though, not cause I still 'fancy' him, but because he's hilarious, and good to talk to. But I'm gonna leave it to him, cause blah blah he's the one who broke up with me...there are rules and I need to wait until HE's ready to start talking...but then what if I don't start a conversation with him an he thinks I'm ignoring him..then he never talks to me again? He's so confusing like that! This is quite a philosophical topic...agreed? It just keeps going.

Whatever, I just need to find something else to blog about other than Kaz.

...........this could take a while.

I think I'll go now,

Good morning!



MG said...

You were AWESOME in the show, just as I knew you would be.

It was wonderful that your pals were so supportive. But how come they're allowed to sit at the front and cheer for you when we have to sit where you can't see us and look at you only out of the corner of our eyes, like you were the case we Put You Off?

Next time I'll be proud Stage Mum in the front row with a camera and Maya can just, yanno, 'low it.

Moany Miss Groany said...

Mother, please never say 'low it' again.

But thankyou!! And at what point did I EVER say you had to sit at the back?...
I could see you really didn't make a difference with you-know-who's handy house lights work.


Spazology said...

Haha Moanie! Your play was probably fantastic... I wouldn't know, I wasn't there. But it probably went much better than any school thingamagigs I have ever done. Lets see what happened to me last time... oh yes. During opening night, I slipped in the middle of one of my songs and knocked over all the props (mind you it was very funny. I couldnt stop laughing, even thought it was in front of EVERYONE) then near the end of the show I tripped and rolled down the stairs of the stage, spraining my ankle. And I didnt have an understudy, so it was potentially problematic that one of the Pink Ladies from Grease was injured and we still had 3 shows. Ah well, thats me... a klutz. About the boy business well I dunno. On one had you could find someone who doesnt attend your school. Makes things less complicated in my opinion. Or you can take a break from guys (gasp I know). OR you can just TALK to Kaz and see where he is right now. There are many more options but this is an awful big comment so Im just gonna leave right now.

Lots of love, hope everything works out,

Spaz xo

Moany Miss Groany said...

Okay...maybe your show DID go a tiny titchy bit worse than mine....


And where the HELL is Oscar?? Where are all your comments?! My blog is NOTHING without you to read it!


Oscarinho said...

Sorry honey, got caught up working the last few few days. CAN YOU BELIEVE THAT!!?? I'm sure I would've been proud of your performance. Hope to see you act sometime (sitting front row, of course).
Heading off to Canada for a couple weeks on Thursday. I'll catch up with your posts as soon as I get back.
Luv ya!

Chu said...

Moanie, you've got another reader! (Actually I've been reading your blog for a while and I also read your mom's site. Oh, and Oscar's blog too, when he posts. Apparently I'm a fan of your family's writing skills!) I've never posted any comments because I'm shy (not true) but now I decided to send this shyness away. :-)

But let me start off being very polite: I'm Camila, I'm brazilian and I got here through a comment you posted on Oscar's blog. I'm his friend, from the times he lived here. The truth is I never posted any comment because I thought I was too old to write here (I'm 29 OMG!!!) but I know, it's just silly of me. Even though I'm pretty sure that 29 sounds for you like, I don't know, 70 sounds to me.

Anyway, I love the way you write and always have fun reading your texts! It's funny because reading the stories you tell about how some of the bloody boys act when they're around 16, 17 makes me conclude that they basically remain the same, no matter the age. Sad, isn't it? Of course there are exceptions, but they surely are a dying breed. That's life...

Well, my blog is in Portuguese but if I decide to start one in English I'll let you know! And please, don't stop writing!


Chu said...

ps 1: Congratulations on the show!!!

ps 2: I promise my next comments will be shorter. I talk/write too much, I know. :-O

Moany Miss Groany said...

Oh thank Christ, another reader!!

Could the fact that you've kept your comments to yourself mean that in actual fact I have over 4 readers...who are also shy? I think not...but thanks for commenting anyway =]

And I enjoy long comments! If you're not going to grace me with an english blog, then please feel free to write an essay of a comment!
I'm guilty of talking/writing too much too...truth be told, at the beginning of my last few blogs I've expected to write about 200 words...I then end up writing about a thousand...but who can blame me? i have nothing better to do.........SEE it's happening again!!


Please don't stop reading! MMG

Chu said...

Moany, I've JUST created a blog in English. I should've done it some time ago, but was too lazy and I didn't want just another version of my blog in Portuguese. I guess some stories will be the same, but written in English, but the "purpose" is different.

So, now you can read me too. And comment - don't be shy, please please.

About talking or no to Kaz, this is a difficult situation. Maybe I'm not the right person to give opinion, since I'm usually very anxious and have this problem in waiting for things to happen. I GUESS that the best thing, since you see each other in school, is to keep the old and good politeness and at least say "hi". I totally understand you willing to be his friend because he's nice and is good talking to him. Believe me, I know what it feels like. But maybe the best option is just give him the time he needs. If there's this true friendship behind the relationship you had, it's just a matter of time and you'll be friends again. That happens! :-)


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